official cereal bar

Well it's been an eventful couple of days, but in order to give me a chance to find some space I thougth I'd post the one I missed last week.

There's three words that tell you everything that's wrong with the modern world.

Nature Valley Cereal Bars are the official Cereal Bar Supplier to the London 2012 Olympics.

Now don't get me wrong here - I'm sure Nature Valley makes a lovely cereal bar.  And if the sports in the Olympics are your bag then I'm sure it's a lovely thing.  If you've got tickets and you're going along to an event then I hope you have a great time.

But why does the Olympics need an official cereal bar supplier?

When the Greeks were wrestling each other, naked and slathered in oil, on top of some mountain somewhere, do you honestly think that the proposition of having an official cereal bar supplier would have made them realise that that's where they'd been going wrong all these years - no official supplier of cereal bars!

Side stepping the issues of the fact the Greeks probably didn't know what a cereal bar was, let alone care, why does the Olympics need an official anything?  Why is the Olympics a brand?  Why does it need marketing?  If it needs those things to pay for it why is it costing us taxpayers a small fortune?

The British Grand Prix doesn't have an official supplier of cereal bars (though I don't doubt Bernie has spent many a misty-eyed moment dreaming of all the extra cash he could rake in if he could just pursued everybody else that what F1 really needs is a bunch of official suppliers of stuff that's irrelevant to the successful undertaking of the sport).  Wimbledon doesn't have an official supplier of cereal bars.

Heck, I don't think even football - the veritable flagship of just how much rampant capitalism can fuck up good things - has an official supplier of cereal bars.  I mean, I'm pretty sure it has sponsors and I would guess it has official suppliers of things like footballs and I know the team's kit is supplied by a sportswear supplier.

But that's my point - sponsorship has an air of "normality" to it (even if it can leave a bad taste in the mouth) and supplying stuff the sport needs makes sense (even if, again, it's a bit capitalist of my personal taste) but having an "official supplier" of something that plainly isn't essential is just not right.

This rant was brought to you by Reebok - the official supplier of trainers to the transperambulation blog.