same old same old

Well, I'm back in the office.

Feels weird, but also feels the same.

There have been a couple of changes.  There's a new face in the office, for example.  We've also bought a couple of new PCs (a very rare event).  There are a few changes to processes and procedures.

Unfortunately not enough and not in a direction where I think we should be going.

I actually had a really long chat about it with my Dad over the weekend.  It was weird as I hadn't really articulated the situation to anybody else previously.  I mean, I've mentioned bits on the blog, but that's a different thing, and I found that in trying to explain it I actually got a better grip on why I'm feeling the way I am.

I actually started feeling this way because of the contracting position, but coming back has thrown into focus that really the issues are a bit deeper than that.

The real nub of the problem is that I think we should be doing certain things in certain ways.  However, in order for them to be done in that way I would need to have more responsibility.  I'd need to be in charge of this part of the company.

But we're a tiny company.  The only way I think I would get that control is, in essence, if the MD retired or I did a management buy out or something equally unlikely and/or scary.

If I was in a larger company there would be more scope for me to be in charge of this bit (or a subset of the bit) without needing to take over the entire company.  I think this is my basic thought process, though obviously it's a bit more subtle than that and there are other complicating issues.

The difficulty is I do like working for the company and I think I still like the types of stuff we do and I like most (I confess not all) of the people who work for the company.

As I say I think the ideal thing would be if there were changes to the company, but I just don't see that happening any time soon.